My first sermon

I preached for the first time today.

One of my colleagues showed a picture of one of our female colleagues. The lady in question looked fabulous particularly for her age. The viewing was followed by a lewd question about whether I would consider being intimate with the lady, "Would you?"
"I'm devoted to my wife." I replied.
"But its OK to look," said a third colleague and I started to walk away.

I don't know why, but I stopped and turned on my heel.
"Actually it's not!" Which I followed up with, "but don't worry, it's alright, your sins have already been forgiven!"

There was silence from my audience, "It's alright your sins have already been forgiven," I repeated and walked back to my desk leaving the two lady colleagues to their stunned silence.

C&A Thanksgiving

Mummy asked M to be one of the Boys Godmothers: M's reaction was wonderful and just showed we'd made the right decision.

So today we went to Church with our friend S, a Christian who until we had lunch with her and husband MC a couple of weeks ago had always thought she didn't have any Christian friends.

We all found out at the start of the service M and S were going to be up there with us. The boys were a bit of a nightmare or was that just me being in the spotlight.

Having being blessed the boys sat down on stage to read their newly acquired bibles and horror of horrors the Curate asked some questions about our family. I'd previously been warned about this, but bang, stage fright!

I was to realise later this is one of the best ways of getting to know everyone. What we really wanted to get over was my participation in Start.

This is a course for those new or returning to Christianity and gives you the opportunity to talk through all those questions and doubts. More importantly it makes you realise it is OK to have doubts and that everyone no matter how mature a Christian they are has doubts.

That's a really important aspect of our faith to understand. Everyone has doubts, but we believe inspite of them, that is faith. To believe or unbelieve without doubt is knowledge and no one currently alive has knowledge of God.

On Our Own

C and I went on our own to Church today. He was so good, in marked contrast to when little brother is about. We had a story about Baylis donkey and C coloured a picture of a donkey with some cuts in  the paper to give the impression the donkey talks.

Then we went back to the main service at the end of the children's groups. He was walking around church shaking everyone's hand saying "Peace be with you, and what's your name?" I nearly choked when I realised what he was doing, but everyone reacted like they had a 3 year old talk to them like this all the time.

As usual M got a great big hug from him and she was so pleased, smitten those two.

It was strange being without Mummy and A, not uncomfortable, like visiting the grandparents house.

Afterwards I talked with K one of our closest friends,she laughed and said "Just how God would do it."

Vicars House Warming

We went to the Vicars house warming today.

Little A picked the biggest green tomatoe he could find off the Vicars tomatoe plants.

The Vicar and family baked for us all, how delicious! I had to work really hard to not stuff myself on orange and chocolate muffins lol.

As usual we stayed way past our welcome.

Mummy grassed me up about the reading I had been doing.

So put on the spot I confronted for the first time the feelings I'd been having for the last week since finishing Lee Strobel's "The Case for Christ." As an ex detective this book spoke to me in  familiar language. The author asked all the questions I was asking growing up and obtained detailed answers from world renowned experts in various fields.

One chapter dealt with the Crucifixion and Strobel discussed this with a forensic pathologist. The description of the Passion was given in detailed terminology I was only too familiar with and when I finished that section of the chapter I was weeping.

The rest of the book was much the same and when I'd finished I was filled with a deep disappointment and sense of being let down by the people: my parents; my four god parents; my grandparents and my school teachers. All of whom should have made sure, indeed had a deep moral obligation to ensure, I was given a rounded view of the arguments between science and religion.

Instead at my most formative time of being a teenager I was subjected to the barrage of science based theories with never a thought by any of the people around me to point out the limits of those theories. For example the "Big Bang Theory" is spouted as fact by multitudes of TV programs, one of which was on the TV last night, and most school teachers. Let's be clear it is still only a theory and never have I ever heard anything that accompanies this ritualistic spouting of the birth of the universe which alludes to the fact the "Big Bang" must have had a cause of which we have no reliable scientific theories whatsoever.

Lets take the "Beginning of Life" science says we all originated in a "primordial soup" with an atmosphere of reactive gases such as ammonia and methane. Rubbish, the experiment that supposedly proved this was a fix!They had no evidence at the time as to what the atmosphere contained and made a guess, which stacked the result in the scientists favour. We now know the Earth's atmosphere at the time life originated was much as it is today inert and unable to support the reactions to create the building blocks of life. The list of scientific fallacies pedalled as fact when I was a teenager goes on.

Yes in education where exams have to be sat and knowledge demonstrated the student must learn the theories but there is massive injustice where we fool our children in to thinking we have knowledge when we we only have theory particularly where this is presented at the time of life where one is questioning everything.  The best that can be said is that we can explain the workings of the universe and the workings of life and how it developed over the centuries, but we cannot and probably never will be able to explain with scientific certainty the birth of the universe and the beginning of life on Earth.

It is fair to say Strobel's book had a profound effect on me, not least because he had direct access to world renowned experts I would never have the chance to interview for myself.

The weight of evidence presented gave me the will to look again at Christ after 30 years of denying him, but I was determined this time I would not have blind faith. In the Church's own words I wanted an informed faith. One that would stand up to scrutiny by me and others, one I could explain rationally and with full reference to the scientific principles I felt so sure of when I was growing up.

But this was not all, you see something is nagging at me. After reading the Passion chapter I felt full like a solid mass was in the space under my heart, a mass that was bursting to get out putting uncomfortable pressure on my ribs and diaphragm. This sensation stayed with me, driving me on to finish the book and again through the second of Strobel's books "The Case for Faith" and through a third book "The Missing Years of Jesus" by Dennis Price.

Occasionally the sensation returns as a reminder to do....... something.

The Washing Machine

I brought the washing machine to the new house on Thursday. I set it up and plumbed it in and it didn't work.

I looked all over the place to try and see what was wrong.

Plugged in? Yes.

Fuse blown? No

So I pulled the machine back out and un-plumbed the whole lot. Took the back off it to the exclamation of "What are you doing!" from Mummy. 

"It's not working," 

"Well don't go breaking it"

"Ok"

I turned the machine on its side and took off the bottom cover.

"What are you doing now?" 

"I am trying to fix it!"

That's when I noticed it. Under the drum was the drive motor and hanging off the drive motor was the power cable. This is normally secured to the drive motor connector with a plastic clip that has a locking latch. somehow this had become detached in our move. When I connected it back up, it seated with a very positive click. Innocuous in itself. But when I started to plumb the waste pipe back in I noticed the connector to the downpipe was blanked off.

Now had the machine worked fine instead of standing in the kitchen I would have been swimming in it!

"Wow that's a bit of luck," I said to Mummy, "Obviously we're meant to be here!"

Only when we got to church did M say, "Divine intervention"

Now that set both me and Mummy thinking.

We Have Started Going to Church

We went to Church today. It's the first time I've been in a very, very long time.

My wife has a beautiful soul. She has bounced between my atheism and her faith for 6 years. In that time Mummy has explored her faith through personal reflection and rediscovery.

It's a sad fact of life that there are places, even in England, where to openly declare your faith will condemn you to torment, abuse and violence from the dross of humanity that inhabits so much of our island. It's bearable when it's just you or you and your partner, but throw in infant children and it's then best to keep your head down, and don't show any outward sign of your faith.

The spark for Mummy's renewed vigour was fanned by visits from Mormon evangelists. Languishing in the pre- language environment of maternity leave and desperate for an adult conversation Mummy began her journey back to God.

As a confirmed Anglican, with a quick, sharp mind Mummy outgrew the Mormon advances quickly and desperately wanted to start attending the local church. The day she came back from the shops and was greeted by the local kids screaming slag and grass at her and our 1 year old put paid to that idea.

But when, at last, we were able to escape from the prison of a nasty cheap and godless little council estate the decision was made for her and, as she wanted to take our two toddlers, for me also.

The choice was ours to make as our new home was on the border of the parish and our first visit to the house took us past the imposing St Luke's.

Our plan was simple, we would spend the month before our move visiting the three local C of E churches and decide which one we felt most at home in.

St Luke's had the added attraction of a faith school, so it made sense to start there.

Suitably scrubbed and washed and feeling more than a little anxious me, Mummy C and A walked through the door of St Luke's 10 mins before the start of the service.

The experience of entering the Church was like being welcomed to an old friends house whom I'd not visited for a while. 

We took a seat at the back of the Church and waited for the service to begin.

I can't remember much of the service. I enjoyed singing, but didn't recognise any of the hymns and no hymn books instead there was modern technology with the words on the screen above and to the side of the alter.

Then there was tea and biscuits and a tap on the shoulder. "They all said there was a new couple and I said that's Vince!"

M is a wonderful lady. I'd worked with her in a role in Government about 2 years earlier where I'd spent a few days each week sitting either opposite or next to her. I'd left at the end of a temporary contract never really having got to know her properly and due to the nature of the business not being given the opportunity to say goodbye.

We stayed way past the end of the service and when the boys decided they were going to explore behind the high altar it was time for us to leave. 

As we walked out of the door Mummy and I looked at each other "Think we've found our Church" we said together.

PS we haven't wanted to try any of the other churches.